This is how much I miss you
I miss you. More than you can ever imagine. Remember when I was little and you sing to me then I always cry because your song is so melancholic and it made me feel like I will lose you. I always want to go back to that everytime. Those clear memories when I was little and having a hard time because there were so many things in our lives that I couldn't understand but I should. You always tell me that someday I will be happy, I will be number one, and I will deserve it just as long as I will believe. I did believe that, mama. And up until now I still do. Every night I cry because I miss you. I miss your smell, I miss your hugs, I miss how you understand me and not being angry at me whenever I throw tantrums and whenever I'm just quiet. You always know my heart's desire. You always know what's inside of me. I miss you mama. You're my comfort. I'm sorry for all the times I didn't spend with you. I'm sorry if I can't provide more for you and papa....